Sonny Blues

Sonny's Blues.  I understood it until the end.  I sort of could catch on to the ending, but not really.  I understand Baldwin was trying to make music with his words, but it was hard for me to catch on what those words meant.  All of a sudden he went from Sonny not being fully into yet and still facing the past to it brought the main characters memories back.  

"I heard what he had gone through and would continue to go through until he came to rest in earth."

Through Sonnys music he was able to hear about what he went through.  I found it interesting because when they were talking you couldn't really tell what he had gone though.  But in his music, Sonny was able to express it to his brother. 

"He had made it his: that long line, of which we knew only Mama and Daddy."

The wording of this statement sort of confused me.  He had talked about the music explaining what Sonny had gone through, but now it is of the times which their parents were living.  It reminded him of the story of his father and his fathers brother dying.  It brought up sadness and the past and brought him past it.  It goes onto to say that he remembered his daughter dying and his wifes tears and how he was beginning to tear.  It makes me believe the music brought up these feelings because when he wrote Sonny saying his little girl died I had to read that sentence over again.  In the story it says it so nonchalantly like no big deal his daughter died and go straight back to Sonny.  Maybe it was purposeful, so that the readers would think no big deal and skip over it like the character actually does in his life.  Then during the music it brings the past up and all of these things he made no big deal a big deal and now he can reflect on it.  The world stops and "waited outside", so that is what the music is doing stopping the chaos and allowing everything to settle. 

pass

Fin

Here it was.  The first day.  The freshmen and their parents stood outside waiting anxiously to check in to the dorm.  The entire Resident Assistant team went to their tables excited to meet the girls that they would be living with on their hall.  When I got to my table my community leaders were ready and we had everything organized.  The doors open.  The girls all scramble in and quickly go to their designated table. 

There she was.  She had dark curly brown hair and bright blue eyes.  She walked gracefully towards the table in her new Northwestern College t-shirt and her khaki bermuda shorts.  I asked her for her name and she said Taylor Adkins and you could hear her thick Alabama accent come out.  I pulled her file out and started walking her to her room where she would spend her very first year in college.  As we walked down the hall I asked her all the usual questions, “Are you excited for your first year”, or “Where are you from?”  She answered excitedly and then I noticed her shoes.  They were white converse with names written on them in colored markers and they had holes all over them.  I asked her about them and she explained how she had all her friends at church camp sign them 4 years ago and now she still wears them to remember to pray for her friends.

She had won me over.  From that very first day we became very good friends.  Every Saturday morning we would go eat breakfast and do devotions.  She was always very interested in my position as an RA and always asked questions about the rules and what I did.  I told her about all the rules at the school and explained that we held high standards like no drinking and smoking. She would often play Devil’s Advocate and try to say why some rules were stupid, but in the end we would both come to the agreement that they were still to be upheld. 

One Saturday morning we were eating breakfast and she told me she had very exciting news.  She told me that she had met a boy and not just any boy, the worship leader of one of the popular worship teams on our campus.  His name was Randy and he was from Detroit, Michigan.  I was excited for her and happy to hear it was a boy that I had only heard good things of.  I was at first excited for her, but after everyday of hearing about all the awesome stuff her and Randy did together, I was getting a little annoyed. I was very confused about how if she wanted me to know so much about him why had not we met yet.  That’s the part that worried me the most.   Then one day Taylor comes running into my room screaming and happily told me that after several weeks of just “hanging out” Randy had finally asked her out.  So that whole night I had to hear about what she was going to wear to their wedding and what flowers she wanted and what type of ring she wanted Randy to get her.

Finally after weeks of bragging about her and Randy I told Taylor that maybe if she wanted to show him off some more that she could actually introduce us.

So later on that day when Randy came to pick Taylor up for a date she introduced me to him.  He was very nice and polite, but very short with his answers to questions.  I didn’t take it personally though and told them to have fun.

It was the next Saturday morning and I was sitting alone eating breakfast and two hours later I received a text.  It was Taylor telling me that she was sorry and that Randy picked her up at 5 am and they went and watched the sunrise.  I would have been more upset, but she was so happy.  The following week all she talked about was how amazing Randy was and how talented Randy was and how handsome Randy was.  I just smiled and tried not to let it bug me.  It was her very first boyfriend after all.

Three weeks later and I have seen Taylor a total of three times.  She has been MIA.  She signs out a lot saying she went to a girl on the halls house.  When I text her she will answer she’s with Randy or doing homework or sleeping.  So I became very suspicious so I decided to do a little investigation on my own. 

First I went to Hannah, the girl Taylor was supposedly always staying over night with at her house.  I just started the conversation casually asking her how school was going.  Then I asked her about her friendships and whom she was hanging out with.  She didn’t mention Taylor, so I asked her how she and Taylor were doing and she sort of gave me a confused look.  Then I knew something was wrong.  I asked her about how Taylor is staying over her house a lot and she sort of paused stunned and exclaimed “O ya she’s always over my house.”  You could tell she was lying.  Her voice got high and very loud.

Now I was sort of worried.  Hannah is lying.  So I wanted to know where she really was.  So I decided to stalk her and follow Taylor on a night she signed out.  Two days later I had my chance.  I saw she signed out and once I did I went to her room.  I could hear her behind her closed door so I went into the bathroom across from it.  I washed my hands about 5 times until she finally came out.  She smiled at me, but said nothing.  She walked away fast avoiding a conversation.  I watched as she disappeared around a corner and I grabbed my car keys. 

I ran to my car carefully trying not to run into her.  As I sat in the drivers seat, Taylor and Randy drove right past me.  I turned on my car and followed far behind them.  We drove for about 25 minutes until we reached a house in a nice neighborhood.  I parked on the street a few houses down from Randy’s car.

They got out of the car and I soon regretted that I didn’t bring anything to do.  I waited.  I didn’t really know what to expect.  I was waiting maybe for a bunch of cars to come and catch a party maybe with alcohol or drugs.  Or maybe catch them having an “overnight slumber party.”  I didn’t expect though to see Randy emerge from the house 3 hours later in a sweat carrying a large bag.  I didn’t really know what was going on.  I mean of course the big bag and no Taylor was suspicious, but I never really considered a worship leader from school doing anything like that.  I was scared, but I just hoped for the best and put it in my mind that this was Hannah’s house and Randy was just dropping Taylor off.

The next day I saw Hannah.  I asked her what she did the night before.  She said she went home.  I asked if Taylor went with her and she said yes.  I knew she was lying, but I just believed her because that’s what I wanted to be true. 

2 days later and still Taylor was not back.

1 week later and Randy was also reported missing.

2 weeks later Hannah confessed that Taylor never had been to her house.

People Creeping

One of our homework assignments last week was to people watch.  I hated the idea of doing that because when I am on el prado I don't usually look at anyone around me and stare at people or anything like that.  So I thought this assignment would be weird.  So I was on el prado watching some people and found like a girl all over this guy and the guy really didn't seem interested and then there was this poor girl with her head down rushing to class (I am pretty sure thats what I look like on el prado most of the time lol), but I still found it a little weird.

Then after we had talked about the assignment and everything in class I actually was sitting there in mi casa cafe one day and saw a girl on my hall come in and I was watching her like who she sat with and what type of people you know she was associating with.  And then I thought about it and realized that people watching is sort of one of the jobs of being an RA.  Especially with me I care about every single girl on my hall in bethany and I feel like their protective mother sometimes because when they are with someone or dating them when I see them I "creep" on them and make sure that person theyre with are treating them right.  So I actually realized that do enjoy people watching and after learning those 5 things Professor Corrigan taught us from that paper has actually opened my eyes more with people watching.  For example tonight in the lobby I was watching some of my girls talking with boys and some othr girls hanging out with girls from different halls.  I heard what they were saying and how they reacted to other people talking.  It really opened my eyes.

Poem and 5 steps of Character

 A Maiden To Her Mirror
He said he loved me! Then he called my hair
Silk threads wherewith sly Cupid strings his bow,
My cheek a rose leaf fallen on new snow;
And swore my round, full throat would bring despair
To Venus or to Psyche.

Time and care
Will fade these locks; the merry god, I know,
Uses no grizzled cords upon his bow.
How will it be when I, no longer fair,
Plead for his kiss with cheeks, whence long ago
The early snowflakes melted quite away,
The rose leaf died – and in whose sallow clay
Lie the deep sunken tracks of life’s gaunt crow?

When this full throat shall wattle fold on fold,
Like some ripe peach left drying on a wall,
Or like a spent accordion, when all
Its music has exhaled – will love grow cold? 



a)  Physical description-  Clearly she is pale with rosy cheeks.  She has fine hair and her neck I believe is long and beautiful.  So this poem is filled with physical descriptions and allows us to picture this character clearly.



b) The things she says-  By her talking about how she will be when she gets older can tell she is insecure about what will happen when she starts getting old.  Where she says when her skin starts to not be fair and beautiful and when her neck becomes saggy like an accordion.  She is worried he will not love her.  You can tell she is insecure too by her thoughts because it never mentions him saying anything about her personality.  


c)The things they do-  This poem doesn't mention anything she does which could also show why she is scared because he never says anything about her accomplishments or successes.


d)  The way other characters resond to them, including the things others say to or about them:  This is about her boyfriend and everything he says is beautiful about her.


e)  Their thoughts if these are shown-  This I put as what she says, but this too could be about the poem itself. I do not know if this is what she is saying or thinking




Here I used this poem with the five steps of character and how we know them in Professor Corrigans handout.

Joel Painting

So this is my painting of Joel where it says
      "Before them fire devours,
       behind them a flame blazes.
       Before them the land is like the garden of Eden,
       behind them, a desert waste—
       nothing escapes them."


So, I am not very good at painting, so I was very scared about our activity so I asked around.  One of my friends was in the class last year and told me were going to have to paint a verse that stuck out to us in Joel.  When I heard this I actually knew which verse I was going to paint about.  It was the verse that stuck out to me in the first place when I read Joel the first time and when I read it again it made perfect sense to draw it.  Because I was so prepared it actually sort of made me lose the meaning of the assignment in the beginning.  But Professor Corrigan not letting us talk sort of forced me to concentrate on the assignment and think about it.  It really helped picturing and then finally seeing it on paper. It made the verse stand out even more.  Just seeing the green and then all of a sudden fire sort of makes you picture it in real life.  When I read it I actually pictured the gardens at lake mirror because I am sure the Garden of Eden was much bigger, but I imagine it being beautiful like that with all the flowers and water flowing.  I actually find it a very scary verse and when Professor Corrigan says a lot of Joel is poetry it makes me wonder if this too is just a metaphor of what God will do.  It is hard to think of God hurting us and His land, but a lot in the Old testament is just that. 

Joel and Poetry

I am not a very theatrical person. At all. I didn't like drama groups or anything while growing up. So when we had to read Joel out loud outside it was different for me. And it wasn't my favorite thing wither usually when I am reading out loud I can't really pay attention to what I am saying. I pay attention to how I am saying it more and when I do try to hear what I am saying I usually start reading in my head again. I also was weary about Joel too. I don't like poetry. In my school since I didn't like poetry in middle school they made me take like this poetry elective. It was awful because I felt like the other kids were catching onto the meaning a lot more quicker than I was. So when reading I just kept thinking what is this about. Instead of like Professor Corrigan said reading it through just to read not thinking about the meaning the whole time. If you do that you miss the whole other part of the poem. So I promised Professor Corrigan I would meet him half way, that he would understand my past with poetry and I will try doing it his way.
But I must say Joel isn’t my favorite when it comes to the Bible. Mostly because I am confused about what to think about it. And how and why Professor Corrigan was telling us to proclaim it to nature. So overall I did enjoy reading without the verses because I feel that if I read with verses I pause at each number instead of reading through the whole thing.

Also the whole time reading Joel I thought about this song we sang in church all the time:



They rush on the city, they run on the wall
Great is the army that carries out His Word
(Repeat)

The Lord utters His voice before His army
The Lord utters His voice before His army

They rush on the city, they run on the wall
Great is the army that carries out His Word

Blow the trumpet in Zion, Zion
Sound the alarm in my holy mountain
Blow the trumpet in Zion, Zion
Sound the alarm
(Repeat 2 times)

Sound the alarm
Sound the alarm